Sunday, June 5, 2011

The Australian

I went to breakfast later to avoid the Mexican. After all, I did not want any awkwardness while enjoying my eggs. To my surprise, I ended up chatting to an Australian. Yeah, I came to escape Australians and here I was sharing my breakfast with a guy from Perth. He actually had been living in Bangkok for a number of years. I wondered why he was having breakfast at my hotel - post hook up meal? Maybe it was the lovely fruit buffet.

Many gay and straight men come to Thailand because they are into Thai girls or Thai boys - the me love you I can do anything with ping pong balls. You can actually buy love in Thailand - and affection. The sight of older European and Australian men with younger Thai men and women is common. Although I hate to generalise, I am normally not attracted to Asian guys (way too smooth!) and shorter them me. I like my women feminine and my men manly (a bit of chest hair is nice). So if you are a single and sexually traveller, the options for white meat in Asia are somewhat limited.

Back to the Aussie. He’s a consultant and lives nearby. He seems interesting enough, lived in New York for a few years, well travelled...good job...apartment with a view. We decided to meet later in the day. I was feeling like some white meat and it was going to be a bloody hot day - good day to stay inside.

So we meet up again. We get naked and I start playing with his cock (sorry mum!). He asks if I mind of he smokes. Normally, I hate smokers...but again beggars cannot be choosers. I was waiting for him to take out a cigarette...he’s from European Melbourne after all. To my surprise I see a pipe..a bong!!! OMG, had not seen those since college. Maybe he’s doing put.

“What ya smoking?” I ask. “Tina,” he says casually. OMG! Tina AKA crystal methamphetamine, tina, crystal meths, krank, tweak, ice. This is totally illegal in Thailand. This is the drug as  that makes you fuck for hours. The minute I started sucking his cock, he started sucking on Tina. This wasn’t the first time a drug had killed my drug mojo. I could see that he was already getting drug fucked. Big turn off. I wondered if I could get high from just the fumes. What about kissing a guy who’s smoking it. This felt bad...really bad.

I’m a drug prude. Sure, I’ll take anything with a prescription but like Nancy Reagan (I realise this will age me..think of 1986) had said to my generation, I normally said no. At least to hard heavy drugs. Of course, I inhaled and tried pot in college. Who hasn’t? You can still be president. I also tried ecstasy one dance party about 8 years ago...all my friends were doing it and I wanted to know what it felt like. My friends enjoyed the best Mardi Gras party ever. I ended up in the medical tent and was on what it felt like speed for the next 48 hours. The half the pill ruined my night. It made me paranoid and I thought someone was chasing me the whole night. I took the same pills my friends did. I guess anxious people should not take ecstasy. Learned it the hard way.

On the bright side, I did alphabetize my CD collection, and sorted my wardrobe by colours and did not sleep for two days. But now, a 42 year old guy doing drugs in Thailand where penalties are and death.  I had flashes of me stuck in some Thai prison (a la Bridge Jones in her second film) and of having to call my mum to tell her I had been busted while sucking cock for using Tina. ARGHHHHH

Ice or Tina is the drug of choice of many gay men..the scary thing is that professionals do it...working people....tina on the weekend and business trips during weekdays. In Sydney it was as common as poppers.  There is really an epidemic in many gay communities.

So while my Aussie friend sucked off, I could not help and think about this drug fucked life...orgies...unsafe sex....Thai prisons. I could not go through with it...I wanted to run away to Nancy Reagan and tell her I said “NO to drugs.”

So I did. I ran. I told the guy I was not really into it. I should have said I was really not into him. What was I doing anyway....having some dirty sexual affair with some white guy who’s into drugs. This is not me. So I decided to stop having casual sex all together...before I meet another looser. Or at least no sex until Europe...everyone knows Europeans put a bit more thought into foreplay than their bong.


  1. I think you did the right thing. I would probably do the same thing.

  2. That's two propositions in two days. Hopefully all of this means that your travels will increase the chances of meeting a guy who is actually nice...

  3. You definitely did the right thing.